By Gabrielle Jackson
Last night I went to see Norwegian folk-pop duo Kings of Convenience at the Sydney Opera House.
Their first words to the crowd went something like this:
'Sitting backstage, we were saying, "We don't have a broken fingernail, our voices are totally OK, we don't have a broken arm. What could go wrong?"
'There's a baby in the audience.'
Then the other half of the duo piped up.
'As a father of two, I applaud your effort, but maybe you could sit somewhere that when the baby is happy you can stay and when the baby is bored you can go out.'
There was a bit of a nervous silence as the audience looked around for the offending baby/parent. Then the KOC star spoke up again.
'You can sit on the side of the stage! It's very accessible.'
More nervous silence.
'I'm serious. Sit here,' he pointed, and the offending mother got up out of her seat, with a baby strapped to her front, and made her way to the front of the theatre to applause from the audience. I believe an usher intercepted her and so I didn't see if she ever got to take her baby onstage, but I thought it was interesting in light of recent media beat-up about parents and mothers in particular.
First, there was the controversy over a Sydney man asking some parents whose baby had reportedly been crying for over 10 minutes to take their child for a walk or find another solution. A column about it generated 1200 comments. And then there was the Melbourne mum who rocked up to her friend's farewell drinks with her baby strapped to her - at 6pm - only to be told minutes later she had to leave, despite only intending to stay for an hour (and the baby being asleep).
Personally, I have no trouble with a mother going to a bar with her sleeping baby at 6pm. I'm sure I would do it if my friend invited me to her farewell drinks and I had a baby.
And to the man who confronted the parents, well I can't say, I wasn't there. Personally, I've never been in a cafe where parents have let their children run wild. I've seen parents trying to enjoy getting out of the house and struggling with children who'd rather run away than drink their babyccino, but never parents willfully ignoring disruptive children. But maybe these people had zero self awareness and deserved the rebuke. Or maybe the rebuker was just a curmudgeon. The thing is, judging whole sections of society (ie, parents who leave the house occasionally) based on second hand anecdotes serves no purpose other than to make way for the Murdoch press to step in as the obligatory Morality Police.
And look, I too applaud the woman's bravery (and good taste) in bringing her baby to Kings of Convenience, but let's be clear: KOC are folk pop. Their music is soft and willowy and makes you want to lie on the grass and close your eyes. Would you want to sit next to a baby at this show - where the audience's sole purpose is to sit silently so they can hear their favourite artists' art uninterrupted? Sorry, I think it's selfish: to the artists and the other fans. And silly, because - honestly - did that woman have a good time?
What do you think? Not just about babies at concerts but at pubs, cafes and restaurants - you know, places where 'people' go?
Last night I went to see Norwegian folk-pop duo Kings of Convenience at the Sydney Opera House.
Their first words to the crowd went something like this:
'Sitting backstage, we were saying, "We don't have a broken fingernail, our voices are totally OK, we don't have a broken arm. What could go wrong?"
'There's a baby in the audience.'
Then the other half of the duo piped up.
'As a father of two, I applaud your effort, but maybe you could sit somewhere that when the baby is happy you can stay and when the baby is bored you can go out.'
There was a bit of a nervous silence as the audience looked around for the offending baby/parent. Then the KOC star spoke up again.
'You can sit on the side of the stage! It's very accessible.'
More nervous silence.
'I'm serious. Sit here,' he pointed, and the offending mother got up out of her seat, with a baby strapped to her front, and made her way to the front of the theatre to applause from the audience. I believe an usher intercepted her and so I didn't see if she ever got to take her baby onstage, but I thought it was interesting in light of recent media beat-up about parents and mothers in particular.
First, there was the controversy over a Sydney man asking some parents whose baby had reportedly been crying for over 10 minutes to take their child for a walk or find another solution. A column about it generated 1200 comments. And then there was the Melbourne mum who rocked up to her friend's farewell drinks with her baby strapped to her - at 6pm - only to be told minutes later she had to leave, despite only intending to stay for an hour (and the baby being asleep).
Personally, I have no trouble with a mother going to a bar with her sleeping baby at 6pm. I'm sure I would do it if my friend invited me to her farewell drinks and I had a baby.
And to the man who confronted the parents, well I can't say, I wasn't there. Personally, I've never been in a cafe where parents have let their children run wild. I've seen parents trying to enjoy getting out of the house and struggling with children who'd rather run away than drink their babyccino, but never parents willfully ignoring disruptive children. But maybe these people had zero self awareness and deserved the rebuke. Or maybe the rebuker was just a curmudgeon. The thing is, judging whole sections of society (ie, parents who leave the house occasionally) based on second hand anecdotes serves no purpose other than to make way for the Murdoch press to step in as the obligatory Morality Police.
And look, I too applaud the woman's bravery (and good taste) in bringing her baby to Kings of Convenience, but let's be clear: KOC are folk pop. Their music is soft and willowy and makes you want to lie on the grass and close your eyes. Would you want to sit next to a baby at this show - where the audience's sole purpose is to sit silently so they can hear their favourite artists' art uninterrupted? Sorry, I think it's selfish: to the artists and the other fans. And silly, because - honestly - did that woman have a good time?
What do you think? Not just about babies at concerts but at pubs, cafes and restaurants - you know, places where 'people' go?
I think it depends on the baby. Some bubs would happily sleep through a concert without making a sound while others would scream the place down. I have a temperamental 6 month old so I wouldn't be confident to take her to a concert/theatre etc but if I had a good sleeper - sure, why not? I actually think most parents are acutely aware of how their children are behaving. I've been out in restaurants and cafes with my baby when she has been crying and its so stressful, you don't even want to stay. There are always a few muppets around who wouldn't care about interrupting others but I think they are few and far between happily.
ReplyDeleteAnother other comments on Facebook include:
ReplyDeleteM.S.: No. Get a babysitter. Yes, family is important, but kids need to know that there are some places which are not for kids. They need to know that it's okay if mummy Nd daddy have a life which doesn't involve them. Parents need to learn to take care of themselves, too. Research shows the kids actually benefit from it. Lastly, we need to move away from the contemporary practice of raising children in a bubble. Kids are quite resilient and won't be scarred by a few hours without you.
Lastly, be more considerate of those who were wise enough to leave their kids at home.
C.F.: Clare and i were there last night, pretty much right behind them, and we were pretty surprised! The baby actually had enormous ear muffs on!!!!!!
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ReplyDeleteN.T. Not cool.
G.E.: It was actually a man that we saw carrying the baby! I didn't see whether he stayed after the comments though.
K.W.: I really couldn't have cared less if the baby stayed, it was kind of nice! And sometimes you just don't know people's family situations- they could have had a babysitter that fell through perhaps. And the baby looked so small, I wouldn't want to leave my baby at that stage. It was cute! More babies at concerts!!
I think with 7 billion people living on the planet now, or is it 8?, we're in danger of over thinking things.
ReplyDelete